A poem, inspired by a picture.

Yeah, there's a story behind this one. My two friends and I were up far too late playing video games when I showed them this image:



Which is from a recent news story, and no one knows what the hell it is.
Anyway, we kept reading up on it and similar things, and became extremely scared.
MANLY MEN DOING MANLY THINGS.
Anyway, I wrote a poem about it:

It's coming.
It's here.
It's all around us.

Its putrid eyes
Staring
Watching
Waiting.

Its talons scrape
The window pane
Like nails on a blackboard

It stares at our souls.

When one of us leaves the rest
And is alone
It will steal us
With a shriek

One will disappear forever.
Two left, it returns and waits.
Endlessly.
No escape.

Making it up as I go along: to be continued?

The moon shone with such intensity that it seemed almost like daylight, casting a thick shadow of trees and buildings onto the train I was on as they whizzed past the fogged-up window. I cast my gaze to the black cat walking along the carriage floor. I still thought it a bit strange to have a pet on board, especially on the way to such a cold and desolate place, but to each their own.

I turned my attention back to the tracks ahead.
We must be nearly there by now.
A few minutes passed, but with everyone so unfocussed, most of them staring into space, heads bobbing to and fro with the train, I'd be surprised if anyone noticed.

A loud crashing sound suddenly erupted from the carriage in front of us, jolting everyone back to the present, and, with confused faces and murmurs of concern around me, I watched as the scenery outside stopped moving and the train screeched to a halt.

I stood up and clambered up the carriage.
I had to see what the fuss was about.
With people now yelling behind me, I walked out the carriage door.
What lay before me, I will say now, was a surprise: absolutely nothing.
Where the rest of the train that contained the driver and many passengers should have been, there lay only tracks, stretching as far as I could see with no signs of life whatsoever.

It began to snow.

'Dark'.

In the dark, next to the door
there is a shape that's nothing more
than a shirt or book or shoe
but it's frightening, you wonder "who
or what is that, beside my chair,
staring at me with fiendish glare?"
and so you hide your frightened head,
push it to your warm, safe bed
'til morning comes, to your surpise
that scary beast, those beady eyes
were nothing more than shoes, marked
made surreal and scary in the dark.

I need not say more.

Was it Robert Plant that sung away
'bout the good times and the bad?
He's had his share
and so have I
some happy and some sad.

But in the end, it's all alright
it all comes down to this:
I'll always have
right by my side
sweet Grace's fragrant kiss.

Have another poem.

They'll find me here
I stand alone
My barren little spot

I stand and wait
and wait and wait
A place that time forgot

And I will stay
And stand and sway
In putrid isolation

I had to watch
My friends endure
Death by suffocation

A vile climate
A frightening thought
I am afraid to move

They'll see me
Hear me
They will not fear me
And me, they will remove

They'll kick me down
Laugh at me
Raise their weapon high

Pull it back
Let it out
This is it, goodbye

But before I go
I spy a bird
Feasting on a tree

Unaware
of all of this
gazing at its beauty

I take the bullet
to my brain
I am erased from earth

And now I lay
Inanimate
'least I wasn't Colin Firth.

A poem I wrote last night.

Oh how I missed thee,
Oh buildings of grey
I found in my absence,
That I need you, nay

Not for you air of depressedness and woe,
Nor the sound of snare and tin that which you flow,
Nor the way you fill me with ironic glee,
Of seeing people drudge, unmerrily

But the way you inspire
A writer's inner mind
To put pen to paper
And further define

Your virtues and features
Oh the way that you do
But I find
My one trick pony
Hath been turned into glue.

Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd.

What can I say about Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind?
"It's fantastic"? It won an oscar, you probably could have guessed that.

It's a film about memory erasure and romance, and explores both of these concepts as deep as one could.
It's got an ending that's open to your own interpretation.

Really, it's a film for thought.
I feel enlightened after watching it.
Go see it.
That is all.

Another copy-paste of schoolwork: 'Cynical Youth'

I sit silently in my bedroom, the television quietly chatting to itself in the background; the ticking of a long-lost clock is the only other sound in this world of mine. After another dull, slightly irritable day at school (which itself is one bar short of a penitentiary) it feels good to be home and away from the world. Composing myself, I can now think back to a time slightly less pessimistic… a time not quite as distrustful; a time of happiness, albeit naïve happiness.

The time in question was just into the twenty-first century, and after the ordeal of a possible digital apocalypse was behind him, man was looking towards his future with wide eyes and a cautious smile on his face. I myself was almost completely unaware of how close the world as I then knew it had come to changing completely. For me, the proverbial light that illuminated the path into the future shone just as bright as I could remember and showed no sign of changing. This light, however, was still not as bright as it used to be.

As a child roughly the age of eight, I was a fan of laughing and playing as much as the next, but still liked to keep to myself, as the whispers referring to me as “that quiet boy” from teachers and parents of friends could confirm.

The place I remember is really nothing special in retrospect, just a room above the office of a friend’s mother, an estate agent, but I remember it as an escape from the world below: the inner sanctum of Tommy’s. It was a room with contents comparable to that of the bedroom of a child worse-off than I: barren, save for a few pieces of furniture, in this case, a few tables and a beat-up monochrome television from a time unknown to me.

Once the overwhelming joy of school (I speak sarcastically, here) was behind us for another day, my then best and only friend (another quiet one) and I would travel across the plains that are Johnsonville, in a quest for our secluded sanctuary above yet another boring office cubicle.

Here, we would laugh and play like any other children of the time, a more simplistic time where rolling a small ball across a series of long, worn, wooden tables was enjoyable enough to occupy several hours of our day. Post-ball-rolling, we would fiddle with the various knobs, switches and flashing lights on the old television until we could find a channel we recognised, and, lying on the now multi-purpose tables, we would escape, even from our escape, and become zombies, hypnotised by the flashing screen.

Once we had broken free of our stupor we would depart from our secret space, never to speak of it to anyone.

What I am told were ‘the best years of your life’ were whittled away in that isolated room, and to some, it may seem like those years were wasted as a social outcast, but what do those people know? Thinking back now to my childhood, sitting in this claustrophobic bedroom, the television still blabbing away just as it would in our hiding spot so many years ago, I realise that my life has just begun. In the immortal words of a famous man, the best is yet to come.

A digression from the usual formula: personal pronouns included.

Today in English, my teacher decided to go off on a tangeant about conformity to society's view of people, and that got me thinking.
She raised an obvious but still important question:
Why care about anyone else's perception of you?

She then answered her own question:
We fear not being accepted.

But that raises a slue of further questions, such as, why should we care if we aren't accepted? People may redicule us, yes, but in the end, it doesn't really matter. If we all spend our time here worrying about changing ourselves for each other, then how can we truly be happy? If everyone is trying to please everyone else, how can we be individuals? Is anyone happy with this?

We need to stop being sheep.
If you don't express yourself in a way that comes naturally, can you really die in content?
I don't think so.

I'm going to try and become more of an individual. More myself. Why don't you?

An amateur blogger talks about a band that no one he knows likes.

The Paper Chase. If you've heard anything of them, you're probably now thinking one of two things. "Oh god, that crap" or "Fuck. Yes."
Never has a band I like created such a polarising opinion.

For those who haven't heard of them at all, let me back up a bit. The Paper Chase are an Alternative Rock band from Dallas, Texas. Led by frontman John Congleton, they've been described as "a jagged structure of avant-garde jazz, noise, indie, and punk".

The premise of the band is a simple, but unique one:
The Paper Chase create scary music. Not ironically scary, not scary as in an ambient horror film soundtrack; music that creates a legitimate feeling of fear.
This, I can speculate, came from the reason Congleton started the band: to vent strange, grotesque emotions and desires locked up somewhere in his subconcious. I swear, if he didn't make a Paper Chase album every few years, he'd have killed someone by now.

The music consists of a combination of what I might describe as some conventional melodies coupled with some intensely overpowering noise rock and Congleton's strained vocals. This creates an extreme feeling of disorientation: a simple melody will be introduced, played out a little and then altered, warped and, for lack of a better phrase, fucked up. Every other instrument hereby kicks in, full of sharp notes and jagged composition.

The Paper Chase are a band that create albums. None of this 'iTunes on shuffle' crap. If you listen to a Paper Chase song out of the context of its album, it loses its soul. Because of this, while they are recognised in the underground and alternative scene, they can never ever be a top 40 band. But that's a good thing.

If you're reading this and haven't heard any of The Paper Chase's music, I urge you to give at least one album a listen, and based on that I'd recommend God Bless Your Black Heart, currently my favourite of their records.

Now this is a perfect time to mention their song and album titles. "Young Bodies Heal Quickly, You Know", "The House Is Alive And The House Is Hungry", "We Know Where You Sleep".. The Paper Chase's titles reflect their music perfectly: they're damn frightening when you stop and think about it.

Ala American History X, I feel if someone's already said it better, I should just quote them. So, as Calvin of Starship Amazing said on this very same subject, "The Paper Chase is the kind of band that makes what I try to do here difficult. They are dark, but not in a cliche or fake way. They are terrifying, but in a way that is entirely human. They make you uncomfortable, but they make you beg for more."

In short, John Congleton is a fucking genius.

Mood: a short story

The tension built up in his chest, overwhelming him with endless stress and worry. It looked like all was lost. Each day was the same: dull, dreary uniformity, walking from place to place with the same look of discontent on his face, those around him becoming snappier and more irritable with each passing hour. Every single thing around him became annoying.

He decided to just let go. Everything would work out in the end, he was just thinking too much about the consequences of failure. Nothing is more important than happiness.

On many occasions, he remembered lines of a poem he had once heard. This poem always slipped back into his life at some point or another. “There is light somewhere; it may not be much light, but it beats the darkness”… “Your life is your life; know it while you have it”.

Wide-eyed, he looked up at the clouds drifting overhead. Several different emotions ran through him: content, cheerfulness; overall, a positive outlook on life. While yes, he was stuck in a class he hated, idly typing away on the computer to kill what time was left before he would be set free into that big, open, welcoming world out there, happiness was the main thing that kept him going. Nothing could bring him down now. With the new Arcade Fire record in his ears, it seemed that life could not get much better than this.

“What a contrast” he thought, “After all of the stress of school work, I’m finally happy”.

Cut to the next day: the final day of term. The stress and panic is back, full-force. It seemed that this was a perpetual routine: worry, despair; realisation, content. Currently, however, he was in the former part of this emotive circle. So many things to do. The prospect of incomplete school work had gotten the best of him, and though his cheery mood from the day before had not worn off completely, it had still faded considerably.

Glancing, as usual, out the window, he could see the colours grey and white staring right back at him from the sky. Below, many trees waved their branches enthusiastically at anyone who cared to look. What a contrast from yesterday. Quickly, this view was obstructed with the drawing of the curtains directly in front of him, pulling him reluctantly back into the chatter-filled classroom that he was trapped in.

His chest felt heavy. Soon, he would have to face his final attempt of completing his assignment. Why the fuck was this taking so long?

This time, the words of a song rang in his ears:
"This place is a prison; These people aren't your friends"
How do these people manage to make music for every situation?

He lay back in his chair, attempting to relax. Here, he spotted the worn ceiling. Many holes had been ripped in it over the years, and it had been warped by previous moisture problems, drooping down overhead, leering at him from every angle.

Finally, the sound of a bell freed him.

The work was finally over. The curse was lifted. Everything was right with the world once more. Just one word from a song spoke to him this time, from the innermost part of his brain:

“Free”.

Straight to the pool room!

Deep from the dungeon of cult classics comes The Castle, directed by Rob Sitch. From the title alone, one would not know what to expect, but the least of these expectations would be one of the most underrated and unknown comedies of all time.

The plot of the film follows Dale Kerrigan and his family. They live in a humble home in suburban Australia, happy and under the belief that “a man’s home is his castle”, the fact that it’s five minutes from the airport does not factor into it. Besides, “it will be very convenient if we ever have to fly one day”. However, all is not well in the Kerrigan household, as they are soon informed that their house is being demolished to extend the runway for the airport, and they will have to leave. Dale’s father, Darryl, who won’t have any of this, asks his budding lawyer and friend (whom has no knowledge on property rights nor constitutional law) to help him with this matter.

As one could plainly see, the story of The Castle is not Shakespeare, but the story is the most minute part of the whole affair. No, where The Castle really stands on its toes is the development and use of the characters in the film. Each character has his or her own well thought out personality and their own little running jokes. From Dale, whose interests include digging holes, his brother, Steve, the ideas man, who is always looking for a bargain in the local trading post, or their father, Darryl, who raises and races greyhounds.

The other strongest point of the film is, of course, the humour itself. Drawn from the characters’ personalities, the humour ranges from flat out obvious to exceptionally subtle. The kind of film that benefits from repeat viewings, The Castle is overflowing with jokes of many different types, a number of which you will probably miss the first time around. Full of one-liners and jokes that play on the stupidity of the characters, this is the kind of movie that you will be quoting for years. The humour may not be for everyone, however, as many of the jokes will fly over the heads of those not at least slightly familiar with Australian humour.

The film is well acted all around. It is never too exaggerated or underplayed, merely providing a believable experience and immersing the viewer into the film, leading them to believe that the characters are 3-dimensional and real, to a certain degree.

This level of acting also compliments the character-driven nature of the film. The acting helps make the characters’ unusual and sometimes farfetched personalities seem more believable, and more entertaining because of this. The Castle also boasts Eric Bana’s first acting job in a film, and while he plays a very minor role, an accountant-come-kickboxer, his character, Con, is memorable and funny nonetheless.

All in all, The Castle is an engaging, hilarious and memorable experience, and while it may not appeal to those who are looking for a serious, story driven film, nor those who don’t ‘get’ the humour, for those who endeavour to watch the film, this castle will not hold any scary surprises within. If you consider yourself a fan of comedies and have not already seen The Castle, your life is incomplete.

F-Zero X? F-Zero Sex!

F-Zero X may be the most enjoyable racing game that I have ever played. The fact that I stumbled upon it at all is a mere coincidence. I recieved it along with a stack of games and an N64 I bought in bulk. Anyway, the game.

F-Zero X was released in 1998 and published by Nintendo. The sequel to the popular F-Zero for the SNES, F-Zero X was, like its predecessor, an advancement in video game technology, though, perhaps not in the same sense.

F-Zero was revolutionary for its time because it took advantage of the Super Nintendo's Mode-7 graphics chip. This chip allowed the SNES to interlace multiple layers of 2D graphics, giving a pseudo-3D look to the environment of the game. This 3D effect, coupled with the high framerate of the game made for a very fast-paced, fun racing game.

F-Zero X, however, was revolutionary because it managed to sustain an even more impressive framerate at all times during gameplay, as well as being able to render 30 racers on screen at any given time. While the graphics were nothing too impressive, even for the time, the gameplay and immense sense of speed more than makes up for this. F-Zero X proved, once again, that graphics always take a back seat to gameplay.

Speaking of gameplay, F-Zero X's offers a ton of things. In the standard Grand Prix mode, you are given three different cups: the Jack, Queen and King cups. Beating all three of these unlocks a harder cup, called the Joker cup. This may seem like all that the mode has to offer, but in fact, if you go back and complete all four of these cups on the expert difficulty, you unlock the 'X cup'. This cup randomly generates tracks, giving the game an almost infinite replay value.

The game also offers a standard Time Trial mode, as well as a Death Race mode, wherein the player is given a perpetual straightaway and they have to eliminate all other racers as fast as possible. There is also a four-player Vs mode, but this mode is limited to four racers, so if you're playing with three friends there won't be any NPCs, eliminating one of the elements that makes the game fun in the first place: the scale of the races. The Vs mode is still enjoyable, but no where near as solid as the single player experience the game presents you with.

As a bonus, if you happen to own an N64 DD (which is highly unlikely), you can purchase the F-Zero X expansion disk. This expansion gives the player access to 12 new tracks, a car editor and a track editor. Since I don't own one, I can't really comment on this portion of the game, but it sounds pretty damn rad, does it not?

All in all, F-Zero X is a fantastic game, and while it was panned by critics at the time for "not being up to Nintendo's usual standard", it is definately worth a look, and is now one of my favourite racers. It even includes a reworked version of Mario Kart 64's Rainbow Road. That's cool.

Holy Invasion Of Privacy, Badman!

Released in Japan in 2007 and in all other regions two years later, Holy Invasion Of Privacy, Badman! for the PSP is a quirky variation on the tower defence genre. Virtually unknown outside of Japan, Badman has risen to the status of cult classic in other regions, and there is a very good reason for that: this game is addictive. Addictive as hell.

Gameplay has you taking control of an evil god-like being, overlooking the contruction and maintenance of a dungeon which is repeatedly attacked by heroes. You are given a blank slate of hundreds of concrete blocks to mine away to, ideally, create a maze that the heroes will not be able to complete. Being given free reign over the shape of your dungeon allows for a lot of creativity.

While mining, you will come across different types of blocks, some of which spawn blob or fireball minions. These minions are the most basic in the game, but at least provide some protection from your attackers. The minions are where the complexity of the game comes into play, however, as this opens up a window into an entire ecosystem that you have to manage. As a blob or fireball moves around the dungeon, it will absorb energy from certain blocks and spit that energy out into other blocks. Once a single block has enough energy, it will change colour slightly, and will spawn a different minion, such as an Omnom (a small bug), a Lizardman, or even a dragon depending on the amount of energy in the block and which type of minion provided that block with energy. You also have to think carefully about the placement of these minions, as some, like the dragon, will attack any others and compromise the safety of your dungeon.

The main goal of the game is to protect the demon lord from being kidnapped by various attackers. Before a hero enters the dungeon, you are allowed to place the demon lord anywhere you please, giving the game another element of strategy. However, if your demon lord does get kidnapped and the heroes manage to carry him back to the entrance to your dungeon, it's game over for you, and back to the beginning.

The game is scored on how quickly you kill each hero, and the minions used to do so. You are given a point score and a rank, allowing for some arcade style gameplay that makes the game very easy to pick up and play.

Another great aspect of Badman is the humour present in the game. Filled with puns and pop culture references, the game will keep you entertained even during the tutorial. Take the title for instance. It's so awesome that I didn't even have to attempt to come up with a witty title for this blog post.

Holy Invasion Of Privacy, Badman! is certainly worth picking up if you can find it, as every time you play it will leave you wanting more. It'll breathe some life into your probably neglected PSP.

Some amazing music.

Time to deviate a wee bit from my usual formula to talk about music. It's electronic music, though, so I suppose that's still acceptable.

Starship Amazing are an electronic band straight out of Anchorage, Alaska. The band consists of Derek Alexander (melodies) and Calvin Hansen (beats). At the time of this writing, they have released 5 albums and 1 EP, the most recent of which being Scoops The Robot and An Apocolypse In Binary: The Memoirs Of Gearhart Deckrion. After recently buying Gearhart and completing my collection of Starship Amazing music, I've thought long and hard about which of their two latest records (which are undeniably their greatest thus far) is best. And I've come to one conclusion: I cannot decide between the two. So instead, I'll just talk about both.

An Apocolypse In Binary: The Memoirs Of Gearhart Deckrion opens with the loud, in-your-face Progress Beckons. The first thing that struck me about this track is the use of sampled gunshots as the primary beat. Allow that to set the tone for the rest of the album: this is some dark shit.

Upon repeat listenings, I can draw some similarities between the structure of this album and the traditional 3-act structure of any good film. Progress Beckons is of course the exposition of the album, introducing the listener to the feeling and tone of the record. The first distruption of equilibrium is brought about immediately after this with Born Like This, Into This, and seems to be resolved at the end of Through Still And Storm through the use of a piano melody, creating calm and lulling you into a false sense of security. This is just the eye of the storm, however, as The Bleak Glory, The Grand Symphony throws you right back into it, another distruption which is later resolved again after a brutal beating in We Few Who Remain, ending softly with various strings as the song fades out. This calm is continued in Everyone Sleeps Alone, until it provides the final distruption that seeps over into A Hideous Triumph Of Form And Function and Within The Stagnant Shadow together forming the climax of the supposed film, the coda of which being shown through the latter half of Within The Stagnant Shadow and There Will Come Soft Rains, using mainly traditional instruments and moving at a much slower pace, giving the album closure.

This probably isn't exactly what Derek and Calvin intended for the record, but that's just what I get out of it when I listen to it. Besides this, the album fills my mind with powerful imagery of a gargantuan hurricane rocking an already bleak city to its core, leaving nothing but the hope left in the survivors to one day rebuild their crumbled metropolis.



Scoops The Robot, to me, represents this hope, filling me with instant happiness and a feeling of triumph, which is why I recommend the two records to be listened to in sequence, Scoops being played second. From its opening with Scoops, The Natural Born Cuddler to the ender, If Love Is A Fire, We Will Set This City Ablaze, this record feels like the progression that the citizens of this unnamed city are going through to rebuild their once-great residence, the closing song representing their relief of this accomplishment and the knowledge that they can finally relax. Scoops contrasts heavily with Gearhart: This is the happiest album of all time.



In short, these are both outstanding records and sit among my favourites in my music collection. They are definitely worth anyone's time, and at only US$5 each, what do you have to lose? (other than ten bucks, but how cheap are you?) You can even stream the albums for free on their site (http://www.starshipamazing.com/) to try before you buy. Get the fuck on that.

"Crash" Racing? Are you sure this isn't Burnout?

Another game I have fond memories of from my childhood, CTR: Crash Team Racing, released in 1999, is a cart racing game for the Playstation utilising Naughty Dog's popular Crash franchise.

While the game, at its core, is a Mario Kart 64 rip-off, it holds several signifigant differences from its source material. For one, the coin system is back from Super Mario Kart, here with wumpa fruit (known affectionately as "apples" to most). Each apple the player picks up gives them a slight speed increase, with a limit of ten apples. However, as an added bonus, once the player has all ten apples, any weapons they pick up to change to become more powerful: The TNTs become Nitros, the beakers slow your enemies down for longer and the Uka Uka and Aku Aku masks (or, as most people know them, "Ooga Boogas") last longer than usual.

Another difference from Mario Kart 64 is the track design. The tracks in CTR tend to feel more polished and look much more interesting, though most of this can be credited to the fact that MK64 was released two years earlier. As well as this, CTR also has an adventure mode, which basically acts as a hub wherein the player drives to a teleporter to their next race. During this adventure mode, the player earns trophies for completing races, as well as relics for setting a specific time on time trial and CTR tokens for picking up the letters C, T and R during the race. Many of the races in the game require a certain number of trophies to unlock, giving the player a limited amount of races to choose from at one time.

Crash Team Racing, as with any good racer, has a multiplayer mode, which supports up to four players racing against four NPCs, as well as each other, for that sweet, sweet first place. In addition to just racing, the players could also go head to head in a battle mode, which, while ripped straight from Mario Kart, is still just as fun as the rest of the game.

While it is a shameless ripoff, Crash Team Racing still provides an enjoyable alternative, even going as far as to have some improvements over the Mario Kart games and while its sequels (which weren't even developed by Naughty Dog) are no where near the standard of Mario Kart sequels, CTR is still worth picking up, especially if you are a fan of the original Crash Bandicoot series.

You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!

Released in 1999 and later ported to the PSP in 2005, as well as being the beginning of a series that today spans 10 games and 5 spin-offs, Ape Escape is a gem you don't have to dig deep for. However, that doesn't make it any less of a gem.

Ape Escape was the first game to take advantage of the analouge sticks on the Playstation's then new DualShock controller. With the left stick, the player would move Spike, the game's protagonist, while tilting the right stick in any direction to hit enemies with different weapons and gadgets or use the net. In this regard, the game is similar to the dual-stick arcade games of old such as Robotron 2084 or Smash TV, though, without the guns and/or killing. This control scheme works extremely well, even today, and makes the game a blast to play.

The objective of the game, in case you hadn't already guessed from the title, is to catch escaped monkeys. These monkeys have been freed and are now being controlled by the game's antagonist, Specter, a circus monkey who's fed up with being told what to do and using his recently aquired "Peak Point Helmet" gains the intelligence to take over the world and attempts to do just that. Specter then commandeers a time machine and sends hundreds of monkeys back to various times in history. Gotta catch 'em all!

The gameplay is where most of the fun lies, of course. You, as Spike, travel back to various time periods to catch as many apes as possible. The levels begin in prehistoric times and progress to a modern (or year 2000 modern) setting. Having so many different settings leaves the game open for some very interesting level designs (including one that is very reminiscent of Lord Jabu Jabu from Ocarina of Time).

Spike's grandfather, known simply as 'The Professor' throughout most of the game, also provides you with many different weapons and gadgets to assist your ape-catching exploits. These range from your standard net and stun-club (which is very similar to a lightsaber, though you cannot slice limbs off with it) to using a remote-controlled car to run down monkeys or a hula-hoop to run faster.

Ape Escape truly is one of the classics for the Playstation. It provides a unique experience and its colourful graphics still look pretty decent today (at least by PS1 standards). If you like the Playstation and Ape Escape isn't already in your collection, you're missing out.

A trip into outer space.

Back in the mid 90s, my household was dominated by the grey slab known as the Playstation. As such, I did not get to experience many other consoles that were available at the time. Sure, my cousins owned a Nintendo 64, but they lived thousands of kilometres away, so I only really got to enjoy it once.

The one system of this era that I never got the opportunity to discover was the Sega Saturn.
Released in 1995, the Saturn was Sega's attempt to pull themselves out of the lull of console sales that the failed Sega CD and 32X had left them in. Unfortunately however, it did not manage to achieve this as well as it should have and was discontinued after only a few

The Saturn holds host to a variety of different games, such as Sega's staple franchises of the time: Virtua Cop, Virtua Fighter, Sega Rally Championship.. as well as many other unique games like Guardian Heroes, Panzer Dragoon and Darkstalkers (not to mention the best version of Bomberman to date, and a shitload of 2D shooters).

Nowadays, the Saturn is greatly underrated. A 2D powerhouse, this clunky black piece of hardware has become one of my favourite systems in my collection. It's a pity, really, that the two I own don't work as great as they should anymore.

Run to the hills.

For those looking for a trip back into retro gaming, look no further than Bit.Trip Runner.
Developed by Gaijin Games and published by Aksys, Bit.Trip Runner is a WiiWare title in which the player takes control of Commander Video, a small, black, humanoid character who runs, slides, kicks and jumps endlessly through whatever the game throws at him.

The game is, at its core, an old-school platformer with emphasis on rhythm. Every action the player makes creates a musical note to go along with the beat that repeatedly loops in the background.

The levels are split up into three worlds, each with their own distinct graphical and musical style. From the dull greys and melancholic music of the first world to the bright, colourful and exciting third world, the game never becomes stale.

The difficulty on the other hand may prove too steep for some. As the levels progress, many different types of obstacles are thrown at you. From sliding under giant catapillars to deflecting square balls, the game will always keep you on your toes. If that's not enough, take just one hit from anything and it's back to the beginning of the level for you.

This difficulty is, of course, reminiscent of the old 8 and 16-bit platformers from the late 80s/early 90s. The graphics, in turn, reflect this, as the designers of the game gave it a real retro feel. Every character is made of pseudo-3D squares, creating a nostalgiac look that really fits the theme of the game.

I've sunk about a dozen hours into it, so why don't you?
Whether you're a retro game enthusiast or just looking for a good, fun challenge, Bit.Trip Runner is definitely worth a download. It's just a pity it doesn't come on a cartridge.

A handheld long forgotten.

If you showed this little piece of tech to practically anyone on the street today, I can pretty much guarantee they would not know what in the hell it is.
Well, at least you readers know what it is, right?
..Right?

Allow me to explain.
This is Bandai's WonderSwan.

Originally released in 1999, solely in Japan, the WonderSwan was a huge leap forwards in handheld video gaming technology. With graphics almost up to the par of the Gameboy Advance in its later days and prominent third-party support from many video gaming giants such as Capcom and Squaresoft, it truly is a pity that the system was never released outside of glorious nippon.

The system was designed by the late Gunpei Yokoi. Does that name sound familiar? Well of course it does, Yokoi happened to be the creator of the original Game Boy and the commercial bomb we know as the Virtual Boy. Apparently he fell out with Nintendo and decided to make his own system to compete with the Game Boy.

Squaresoft even went as far as to release updated ports of Final Fantasies I, II and IV, the former two eventually being ported to the Playstation in the form of Final Fantasy Origins.
Yes, those snazzy, new versions of the first two Final Fantasy games that many people thought were exclusive to the Playstation at the time were in fact released two years earlier, on a handheld no less.

In addition to ports of their beloved franchise, Square and Bandai also collaborated on creating two special edition WonderSwan Colour consoles, bundled with either Final Fantasy I or II.

However, the main thing that set the WonderSwan out from its competitors, as you've probably already noticed, was the addition of a second D-pad. This allowed the system to be held horizontally or tilted vertically for some games, giving arcade or puzzle games a more authentic feel on the system's wide (or tall, depending on which way you're holding it) screen.

On top of all of that, the WonderSwan takes just one AA battery and manages to squeeze an impressive 15 hour lifespan out of it. Some of this can be credited to the lack of a backlit screen, but this omission can be expected as this was not the industry standard at the time.

The WonderSwan really deserves more credit today. It helped progress the power and design of handheld gaming systems and provided a pretty damn fun experience while doing so. If it were ever released outside of Japan, it would be a wonder that this swan never took off.

Those mega men.

While the game may not be a step back into my childhood like others, I can still find some sentimental value in Mega Man 2 on the Nintendo Entertainment System.

Mega Man 2, in case you've been living under an 8-bit rock for the last twenty two years, is the second in the now classic Mega Man series made by Capcom. The game is an action-platformer with a semi-non-linear gameplay style, wherein the player can choose to tackle the eight robot bosses in any order they choose before being forced to plunge back into linearity to get through the final levels and defeat the evil Doctor Wily at the end.

The ability to be able to choose which level to play from the beginning allows the player to choose how difficult they want the game to be once they know what the easiest order is. For example, one could attempt to take on Quick Man from the get-go.

Standard to the Mega Man formula introduced in the first iteration of the series, Mega Man 2 rewards your victory over a boss with the ability to use their weapon for the rest of the game. Each robot master has his own weakness to another master's weapon, and the player can also use these aquired weapons to experiment of ways to beat levels quicker or make enemies easier to conquer. This allows for a deeper degree of strategy than one would come to expect from a seemingly standard side-scroller on the NES.

Being able to change weapons at any time also allows the player to limit themself as much as they want, gaining an even greater challenge from the game.
As well as all these self-regulated limitations, the game offers a hard mode, wherein Mega Man takes more damage and the enemies take less.

Of course, as is now standard with the Mega Man games, the most important aspect of the game besides the core gameplay is the soundtrack. Every track that is belted out by the old machine still holds up today as some of the best video game music of all time. Catchier than most pop music, each song in the game, once heard, will never leave your head.

While I wasn't even alive when Mega Man 2 was released (I was born five years later) and I did not play it as a child (I only got my hands on a copy last year), I can still find some nostalgic value in the game. Something about the graphics and presentation get me pining for my childhood days where I could play a game for days on end. Perhaps this is because I grew up on the 8-bit Gameboy, which was practically emulating the NES' graphical and musical style.

Mega Man 2, as a whole, is a game that, in my mind, cannot be matched by many others, past or present. This game is perfect. Any flaws in the game merely add to this, as it feels more real because of them. This game was designed and made by real people who really put their heart and soul into it, and you can feel this the moment you pop the cart into your Nintendo.
If you, the reader, have not already played this game, you have never experienced gaming as it was truly meant to be.

Video game gold.

I feel it best, when making a new blog as I am, to start at the beginning.
For me, that beginning is represented by my first technological endeavour, known to most as the 2000 Gameboy Colour release, Pokemon Gold.

Pokemon Gold may be a small, insignifigant and outdated game by today's standards, but it opens a window into my childhood that cannot be created by anything else. Every single battle, every place, every graphic, every note in every song in this game takes me back to my childhood and how I felt playing this game for the first time on August 29th, my birthday of that year.

I can still remember the feeling of holding that brand new Gameboy Colour in my grubby little hands for the first time, inserting the cartridge, turning on the power and being transported into a world I have not left behind to this day. To play the game now is to become a child again. The ins and outs of every cave, the strategies used to defeat every gym leader and the locations of every pokemon in this game will always remain with me until the day I die.

No, this blog entry is not about the workings and presentation of the game, more how it holds a place in my heart as one of my favourite video games and as one of the greatest video games of all time. This game is part of a small collection of things that represent my life.